Online Counseling in South Carolina
Being a foster parent is one of the most rewarding and exhausting things you’ve ever done.
You opened your heart and your home with a desire to care, a longing to offer love and stability for children and families in a season of hardship.
But it isn’t quite what you expected.
Maybe some days feel pretty normal for you. You get to love this child, or children, in your care. You get to know them more and begin to bond. You enjoy family dinners and playtime.
Then some days are filled with turmoil. Visits trigger hard feelings for your child. More intervention is needed, and it seems like you spend more time at appointments than you do at home. The turnover in caseworkers has everyone feeling confused, and you never know what to expect. You go to court hearings and review boards, ready for whatever is next and happy to share how your child is doing in your care, but you get overwhelmed, anxious, and leave feeling more uncertain and worried than before.
Most people don’t understand what you’re going through. It’s a complicated, nuanced system to live in.
Maybe you’re experiencing lots of different feelings that seem to swirl within you like a tornado forming in your gut.
You worry how your foster child or children are feeling, how they’ll be able to process everything they’ve experienced.
You think of your family- even extended family. Maybe being a parent has brought up feelings of your own childhood.
You feel sadness for the bio family. And- it’s hard to admit- but maybe also anger. It’s a confusing experience, to know a child is hurting and to hurt for them, but also hurt for their family and the barriers and systemic brokenness that led to foster care intervention. You hope for healthy reunification and care for the family, while knowing it’s out of your control, and managing your own feelings.
Maybe you can’t quite put your finger on it, but you’re feeling disorganized, exhausted, and stressed. You’ve probably heard of secondhand trauma before- it sounds intimidating, but it can be very real, and it’s something to be aware of. You are working hard to be trauma-informed and provide the best care for your child. But you’re often taking the brunt of their feelings and their trauma responses.
So whether you’re trying to keep your calm in a tantrum, or trying to offer supportive listening as they ask all the hard questions, you also have to care for yourself, and find ways to cope and manage your own emotional experience as you see your child hurting.
Yet you also try to hold space amidst the chaos for the good too. You feel so much love for your child. You’re filled with joy when you see them learning, creating, and enjoying life. It’s a blessing to you when they begin to trust, to allow you this special place in their story.
Your heart overflows as you see growth and happiness forming. It can be easy to focus on the negative, but there’s positive in all the love your heart can hold.
You chose to be a foster parent for a reason. It’s a strange experience- to enter into a system that you know is broken, with the hope of helping, yet feeling limited in all you do.
But you care. You love wholeheartedly. There’s so much you’re learning as a foster parent, but most of all, you look at the child in your care, in your family, and you love them. You see how wonderful they are, and you hope and pray for their own stability, safety, and well-being. You want them to know they are loved, know matter where they are or who they’re with.
You’ve learned that you can’t be a foster parent in isolation.
You need support.
You need- and deserve- a space all to yourself.
But what does it look like for you to get support, when so many things feel out of your control?
That’s what I’m here for.
You might feel limited in what you can do, restricted in what you can say. You’re hurting and loving and you can’t do this alone.
I’m here to help you navigate the ups and downs of your foster care journey. It’s a unique experience, and I understand just how challenging and complicated it is.
Therapy will be a safe place for you to process all of your feelings. You hold space for everyone else to feel all the things, and you deserve that too. There’s no guilt or shame here for your hard feelings, questioning, and worrying.
Counseling also helps you navigate the trauma of the foster care system. You’re afraid of burning out, of experiencing trauma yourself and struggling to cope. You need support in knowing how to deal with this, and how to truly care for yourself and maintain your own needs as you give so much of yourself to those you love.
Therapy can also be a safe place for you to work through all the parenting challenges. Maybe you need to brainstorm new techniques to help your children grow, learn good choices, and manage their emotions in healthy ways. Therapy can support and guide you as you guide them.
Your needs as a foster parent are unique, and therapy is a personal, individualized experience where you can get what you need.
You deserve joy, peace, and calm, in the midst of the chaos within and around you.
But how do you fit one more appointment in with everything else in your schedule?
I offer online counseling (through a secure, HIPAA-compliant video platform) so that therapy can be convenient for you, and not another stressor in your already busy schedule. So wherever you are in the state of South Carolina, you can still get the support you need.
Reach out today to schedule a free 20-minute phone consultation.
You can care for yourself, too.
Contact me today to schedule your free 20-minute phone consultation.
During your free consultation, we’ll talk about how therapy can help you gain support as you navigate the foster care system. We will also discuss your needs and expectations for counseling and how I can help.
After our consultation, if you want to move forward with therapy, we will schedule our first session. Reach out today to schedule your free phone consultation to help you determine your next steps in therapy.